ANIMANIACS IN “TWAZ THE DAY BEFORE CHRISTMAS”
Original Air Date: November 29, 1993

BACKSTORY 

Animaniacs first aired on “Fox Kids” afternoon animation block in 1993. It was the second collaboration with the channel and Steven Spielberg’s Amblin animation division. But even though the characters in Tiny Toon Adventures were clearly inspired by famous Warner Bros. stars, the Warner Siblings – Yakko, Wakko and Dot…

These guys

Are firmly rooted as spiritual successors to the cartoons brought to life by the likes of Chuck Jones and Tex Avery (even though they were designed to look like song-and-dancey, monochrome cartoon stars of the 1920s and 30s like Bosko and Felix the Cat.)

Senor Spielbergo

Animaniacs premiered three years into the Fox Kids animation block and triumphed as the network’s second highest-rated program (right behind Power Rangers.) However, the writing was on the wall – Warner Bros. was embarking on its own affiliate network, and they’d likely take their in-house animated programming with them.

Previously in Warner Bros. reinvention

As such, Fox opted not to fund a show they’d eventually lose – no matter how popular – ordered a paltry four episode second season, and reran Animaniacs for two years until they eventually made the jump to Warner Bros. own network in the “Kids WB” block.

What the duck?! The Warner sibs were originally a different beast

Given that Animaniacs was heavily influenced by the older WB theatrical shorts, the show spoofed decades’ worth of pop culture that would often go over kids’ heads. It was reported in 1995 that a fifth of the show’s one million weekly viewers were over 25-years-old, and unfortunately, that wasn’t an audience that jibbed with the Kids’ WB block, so the network’s interest in the show lessened. Funding was cut for new episodes of the still immensely popular show, and a large portion of those episodes drew from unused scripts and storyboards from the first Fox Kids season. (To put that in perspective, over 65 of Animaniacs 99 episodes, airing over five years were produced during the Season One.)

See what jokes sailed over your young heads 

The last new episode of Animanics aired in November of 1998, and went on to enjoy successful syndication on both Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network. During the height of their popularity, the Warner Siblings would star in one theatrical short (“I’m Mad” premiering before Thumbelina) and one non-theatrical film (direct-to-video Wakko’s Wish.) The series also won a Peabody, multiple Daytime Emmys, and an Annie Award for Best Television Program.

BREAKDOWN

Jesus Christ, I had no idea how much I missed Animaniacs. While there is a new Looney Tunes Show on the air right now, this 1993 show is the last animated endeavor to fully embody what made those old Warner Bros. cartoon shorts ultra-special.

The title sequence gets some added snow!

As hyper-kinetic monsters of mischief, the Warner Siblings alone arguably remain animation’s most worthy spiritual successors to Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck that I can recall.

The gang’s all here

Add to that, a lot of the zany, totally-insaney action was scored with original compositions by a 35 piece orchestra, giving it that good old Carl Stalling flavor. There’s even a direct Looney Tunes musical tribute in this episode, but I’ll get to that later…

“Citizen Kaney” – one for the kids!

With that said, I suppose I should apologize to hardcore Animaniacs fans for skipping the first Xmas special. The season 1 episode that was produced first was also Holiday themed. However, it was yet another A Christmas Carol spoof. And hey, we’ve written plenty of those up here already. (Hello, Mr. Magoo, Uncle Scrooge and Bugs Bunny.)

Deceptively begins a Slappy Squirrel cartoon

Besides, this episode featured far more variety, and I love how it takes ALL of the characters, the show had only recently established, and essentially sets up an original Christmas sketch show.

Trimminz

The episode, somewhat falsely starts out as a Slappy Squirrel short. Skippy can’t sleep, so his cantankerous steward reads him a bedtime tale entitled “The Day Before Christmas.”

Somebody must tend to the Warners’ Xmas needs

Thing is, the story takes place on the Warner lot in the present day. Somebody’s got to deliver the Warner Siblings their Christmas gifts, or it’s expected they’ll go ape shit.

Flavio and Marlita Hippo and Mr. Mime

This rhyming poem parody is pretty fucking great, and is little more than a wonderful excuse to gather all the characters from Animaniacs together, playing themselves, in one quick Christmas short!

An appearance by Rita, Runt, and an uncredited Micheal Keaton

Yep, everyone makes a brief cameo. Such as Pinky and The Brain!

“NYARF!”

The GoodFeathers are also here, whose existence only now strikes me as amazing! Imagine that pitch meeting: “Who are these kid-friendly birds based on?” “Umm… three foul-mouthed, murderous mafiosos from an R-Rated Martin Scorcese film.” “My kids love Joe Pesci – let’s do it!”

“You callin’ me festive?!”

And these poor pigeons have the most unfortaunte task of pulling the studio-appointed Santa…

That sleigh will have to be returned

Yep, Ralph “Duh-Durr” the Security guard is tasked with getting the Warners their presents. And wouldn’t you know it? Mild shenanigans ensue!

Can’t even take receiving free presents seriously

Next up, you’ve got the first of two “Good Idea, Bad Idea” Christmas shorts starring the Mr. Skullhead (who originally appeared as a decoration on Elmyra’s bowtie in Tiny Toon Adventures!) Fortuantely, the jokes are so brief and simple I can pretty much just show you my favorite.

“Finding Easter Eggs on Easter morning…”

“Finding Easter Eggs on Christmas morning…”

lol

Okay, can you name the one Animaniacs character who didn’t show up during “The Day Before Christmas?” No, Buttons and Mindy appeared briefly at Ralph’s security gate…

Can you see him?

I’ll give you a hint, the short is titled “Jingle Boo.” Yep, it’s Chicken Boo, quite possibly my least favorite Animaniac, and his holiday short unfolds out in the same quick, one-note fashion. Chicken Boo is posing as a mall Santa, completely fooling everyone. Eventually, one person catches onto the ruse…

A kid, I believe, based on Ralph Phillips, star of two celebrated 1950s Chuck Jones shorts, who appeared several times in Animaniacs

As always, the humans eventually catch on to Boo’s inexplicably scheme (usually just offering a simple service) and kick his ass right the hell out of the mall. But since it’s Christmas, Boo gets a happy ending for once…

That’s a helluva ride home

After that, Wakko belches out a stirring rendition of Jingle Bells…

Belch-belch-BLEEEEEEEETCH

“The Great Wakkorotti” sketches were clever reuses of existing Animaniacs animations, with frames and timing slightly altered to fit whatever song Wakko’s burping. You could call lit halfassed, but I never get tired of it.

And the crowd goes wild!

Okay, now it’s time for my favorite piece from the episode “Toy Shop Terror.” In this speechless short, we find the Warner siblings making mischief in a toy shop after dark…

Yakk-in-the-box

First of all, the piece contains several breathtaking animated sequences (for TV anyway) with the environment moving along with the characters…

“Not on my watch!”

But the real star of the show is Raymond Scott’s “Powerhouse” – the old Looney Tunes staple composition! Trust me, you know this song. Think of every factory sequence you’ve ever seen in a Warner Bros. short and you’ll probably be humming it instantly.

Buh-Bum-Bah! Banana-na-na-na!

The toy shop owner’s sercurity robot is, of course, foiled in the spirit of fun and we move on to a song I’m fairly certain many of you will remember.

I recall Yakko’s “Universe Song” almost verbatim, although, I don’t remember it being part of a Christmas episode…

Nothing to say, really. Just love this pic

But it’s oddly appropriate, as it reminds us how tiny we are in the scheme of the universe. Like special little snow flakes… the size of Mickey Rooney (another reference for the kids!)

And FIN

None, really. Which isn’t surprising, however, the previous Christmas episode featured a rather risky retelling of the story of Jesus Christ.

Hello, nurse! Seriously, can we get a nurse?!

I don’t care, it’s getting full Santa points for this image alone:

Like The Rocketeer, but fat and jolly

Just wonderful. Perhaps I’m a tad biased towards the classic characters Animaniacs are paying reverence to, and/or shockingly surprised by how well this 90s cartoon holds up, but I love that this is a wall-to-wall Christmas show packed with music, humor and variety. Furthermore, it’s not cynical, overly sweet, and conveys no moral lessons whatsoever. It simultaneously traditional, yet a radical departure from other Christmas specials… Far better than that semi-terrible Bugs Bunny one Chuck Jones and Friz Freleng worked on in fat. Throw it on with “The Classics” and I guarantee it’s feel like a breath of fresh air.

Tragically, Animaniacs is suffering the same fate of other fun 90s cartoons: A lack of interest. Like Darkwing Duck and TaleSpin, a handful of chronological DVD volumes were released, then discontinued before completion. It’s all the more sad once you consider these shows aren’t even played on TV anymore. Anyhoo, the first two seasons of Animaniacs are comiled into three DVD volumes, with the Christmas episodes contained on Vol. 2. Be buyin’!

Yesterday’s Christmas Special
CASPER THE FRIENDLY GHOST

2010′s Dec. 7 Christmas Special
MICKEY’S GOOD DEED

2009′s Dec. 7 Christmas Special
RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER 

]]> http://www.acartoonchristmas.com/2011/12/09/animaniacs-christmas/feed/ 6 http://www.acartoonchristmas.com/2011/08/24/segregate-your-favorite-cartoon-stars-with-the-cartoon-color-wheel/ http://www.acartoonchristmas.com/2011/08/24/segregate-your-favorite-cartoon-stars-with-the-cartoon-color-wheel/#comments Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:48:35 +0000 cantista http://www.acartoonchristmas.com/?p=4362

Slate.com offers an awesomely easy way to breakdown you favorite characters into proper pantoned ethnicity! See full pic after the jump…

Goddamn, this is great. First thing I loved is how this interactive chart can help you be a better animated bigot!

Click on over here to play with Slate’s interactive version

Note how not all colored characters are created equal. Bart Simpson and Top Cat could both be categorized as “yellow,” yet real world wars have broken out between cultures of similarly distinguished pigmentation.

Plucky, Genie, Grinch, Gazoo, Turtles – Christ, my head is spinning!

Another thing I couldn’t help but notice is that much of the wheel (roughly half) comprises blue and green characters, and most of which remain all-time personal favorites. It reminds me of a rejected Muppet t-shirt design from a recent Threadless contest involving a kickass premium Muppet Green Album pack. You should probably buy that, actually.

Why are the so few shirts about rainbows?!

The Looney Tunes have been employed to hock all manner of moral movements consumer products… but spring water?! More stupid Looney Tunes prodcuts below…

Such is the case in Australia, as Bugs and Co. are heading up a slam-bangin’ hydration initiative known as “Looney Tunes Active.” Says a Pure NZ Spring Water spokesman:

“The Looney Tunes brand is a perfect fit for NZ Pure Spring Water’s strategy behind the product… Looney Tunes Active encourages children to eat healthy and to be active.” Whatever you say… I mean, kids like water, but usually when it’s coming out of a hose, gun, or water park slide.

Available in every size kids come in!

It’s not the silliest thing I’ve seen the Looney Tunes shill for. Here you can see the Aussies using the Road Runner in a car commercial that dates back to 1987

Here you can see madcap, irreverent Bugs Bunny singing the praises of “Locked in Freshness!”

Or would you prefer to let Bugs and Elmer tell you where to stay on vacation?

And these are just the sillier commercials. Don’t call it “selling out” – From the moment these characters stopped appearing in theatrical shorts, the Looney Tunes have ALWAYS been for sale. Some day I should do a whole piece on this…

While Warner Bros. is doing an admirable job revisiting our favorite desert-dwelling duo in CG, one fan doing them 2D justice in an incredibly fitting parody…
Last week, I wrote a long-winded diatribe about the new Looney Tunes Show and what makes those characters so goddamned special… now I’d like to think a thesis buried in that garbled nonsense pertained to the importance of classic LT sound effects and Carl Stalling’s original music. Well, I’d been hesitant to even watch this parody from Rob Yulfo I haven’t seen 127 Hours, but it actually helps my nerdy case a great deal!

That said, I should’ve complimented WB for their work in those new Road Runner and Coyote shorts that’ve been airing theatrically in front of movies I may never see (Legends of the Guardians and *shudder* Yogi Bear.) From the glimpses I’ve seen, they’re actually astoundingly true to the spirit of the original Chuck Jones shorts, while employing a more contemporary form of animation to be visually compelling in a new way:

It’s not that I didn’t notice, it’s just that I’m nowhere near the fan of their adversarial work as I am of Bugs and Daffy. CG Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner cartoons are confirmed for airing as part of Cartoon Network’s upcoming The Looney Tunes Show, I’m not sure if they’ll all be of the quality of the handful of theatrical shorts. Can’t wait to find out.

RELATED ARTICLES

PETUNIA PIG FOR PRESIDENT, BUGS REPEALS
SLAVERY, AND OTHER LOONEY ACTS OF PATRIOTISM

TWEETY AND SYLVESTER star in:
GIFT WRAPPED

ROAD RUNNER & WILE E. COYOTE star in:
BUGS BUNNY’S LOONEY CHRISTMAS TALES

That was sarcasm… However, I should say I don’t think the snippets from the new Cartoon Network show are all that bad. But they’re certainly a bit weird…

First off, there’s a clip of Bugs and Daffy back in familiar territory: Jammin’ on some B-Ball, yo!

That was s minor jab at Space Jam, which I’ve only recently become totally comfortable hating. Yet I don’t altogether dislike these new clips, although they’re certainly guaranteed to rub a lot of old fans the wrong way. I see what the showrunners are getting at: Bugs and Daffy do not have a bad comedic interplay, and their new designs remain fairly authentic to the designs Tune fanatics cherish…

Outside of the occasional facial expression

But it’s hard to deny that, well… there’s not anything particularly “Looney” about the exchange. If you closed your eyes and just listened…shhh… you’d probably have no idea what you were even watching. That’s something you could NEVER say about any of the old Warner cartoons, and no, I don’t attribute any of that to Mel Blanc being dead.

Same as the old DONG

It takes almost 45 seconds to get to an unrecognizable “CLANG,” and frankly, that’s a relative eternity compared to the pacing established by a legacy of seven minute cartoons. What I can easily attribute the awkwardness to is the lack of Carl Stalling’s score and overall tempo. Not that I’m demanding it should be there or even emulated (I’ve seen WB try and it’s either a synthesized disgrace or an oversimplified Hollywood orchestral better suited for a Beethoven sequel) but there should be something there, right?! Right now the temp score is, literally, just crickets.

FUCK, this is Looney!

As much as I believe Stalling is both an uncredited character and foley artist, I think the video above could’ve benefited a billion fold by even just straight-up reusing old Warner Bros. sound effects. They haven’t aged a bit and they’re (IMO) the funniest SFX in all of cartoon history. You could argue the score essentially defines what a Looney Tune is, but I’d rather point out that those old sounds are probably just lying around the WB offices for use at their free disposal. But I’m a classic nerd. I’m unbelievably willing to admit that I probably won’t be happy unless Daffy’s bludgeoning people with mallets, or Bugs is cramming exploding cigars into somebody’s face. With that in mind, the next clip is a little more disconcerting.

What are you waiting for?! Hit him with a bat or something!

I remember reading a piece in the New York Times on how irrelevant the Looney Tunes have gotten. Despite a longstanding popularity with every generation since their inception, American kids under ten have almost no idea who they are… due almost exclusively to their disappearance from US airwaves. That sucks. But so have WB’s attempts at new life.

Aw ye-yah, dawg!

The article made mention of this new program, and how The Looney Tunes Show was going taking cafeful steps to avoid past failures, largely by retaining the classic look and feel of the characters, and even opting to put the whole LT gang under one roof for hijinks to ensue. Sounded cool to me. At least, until I saw these and it hit me… this… this is a sitcom?! Next clip!

The Looney Tunes are infinitely adaptable to most situations, although, not necessarily situation comedy, which is to say another genre or format, not unlike action (see above) or, um, being babies.

Honestly, can you blame kids for not giving a shit?

So while I don’t think the clips above are evidence of animated atrocities anywhere near what’s come before, this doesn’t feel a whole lot like the Looney Tunes I know, or wanted to see. (Yes, I’m aware I’m no longer the demographic… bu tI’d like to be!) I don’t know what to define the Looney Tunes’ particular brand of kinetic, madcap, slapsticky comedy subgenre as… other than just “Cartoon.” Sounds simple, but you get what I mean, and it’s the comedic format that forged them, and vice versa, It’s served them well and that’s where they’re better off working.

Adapting to the 90′s was rough on all of us

Yes, I get that the type of cartoon I’m looking for is the product of a bygone era, and that certain alterations have to made to fit a half hour format, but I wasn’t expecting something along the lines of Two and Half Men. (Or to be a little more complimentary, The Office.) More importantly, this is everything I dislike about the Looney Tunes when they work in ensemble form, and the further Mickey Mouse-ification of Bugs. Oh goodness… Please! Let me explain.

Even Disney animators recognized Bugs’ personality by animating a frame of him flipping the bird to Mickey Mouse in Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Every time the LT gang gets together, it forces Bugs Bunny into the role of “Team Leader,” leaving him with little more to do then smirk knowingly and deliver exposition while everyone else gets the good lines, when Bugs should be out in front kicking villains in the ass so they fall down into pies made of seltzer bottles while making out with people in drag.

“C’mon, lemme do something violent, Doc?!”

It makes him profoundly dull and uninteresting. It only took Disney a few years to delude Mickey into a corporate spokesman, whereas it seems to have taken Bugs the better part of a century… which is more depressing when think that his adversarial, slapstick legacy still defined him a less than a decade ago, at least while you could still see those cartoons on TV, anyway…

What the fuck are all these humans doing here unscathed?!

An unfortunate byproduct of this it that it tends to force Daffy into the leading  role. This can be awesome if you love the duck. Less so, if you don’t like him solely acting like a dick, and thus having to see his narcissistic side ramped up to 11 billion just to drive conflict. There is a “Good Asshole Daffy,” where his actions come across as a wacky thoughtlessness, and allows him to conduct himself accordingly as long as he receives some comeuppance by the end of the cartoon.

If you’d like to see an example of “unlikable asshole Daffy” just think of anything he did with Speedy Gonzalez, or damn near anything else he did after the 60’s because I dislike that shit too much to embed. I mean, just because the dynamic worked in worked well in “Wabbit Season/Duck Season” doesn’t mean it has to work all the time…

There’s got to be a better way to combine the two characters… I just haven’t seen it done in my lifetime. DAMMIT! This was supposed to be a short post!

RELATED ARTICLES

PETUNIA PIG FOR PRESIDENT, BUGS REPEALS
SLAVERY, AND OTHER LOONEY ACTS OF PATRIOTISM

TWEETY AND SYLVESTER star in:
GIFT WRAPPED

BUGS BUNNY & FRIENDS star in:
BUGS BUNNY’S LOONEY CHRISTMAS TALES

If you’re as unmoved as I am by residual nothingness surronding President’s Day, please allow the Looney Tunes gang to regale you with the finer points of the GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKIN’ AMERICAN CONSTITUTION! More videos after the jump…

In this trio of PSAs originally shown on Saturday mornings in 1986, Warner’s stable of cartoon inimitable characters use the US Constitution to beat you about the head with a mallet of pure Patriotism! In the first video Petunia Pig outlines how this sacrosanct document from our white wig-wearing forefathers was actually fairly clear about female presidents to a slightly misogynistic Porky. (It’s less clear on the legality of electing pigs to public office, but I wouldn’t put anything past the Red States.)

“I’m a farmer and this pig really speaks to me”

Another PSA stars the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote, although, it’s not as specifically informative. If I had to guess, I’d say their “Pursuit” appears to be a metaphor for that of the “Pursuit of Happiness,” and the ravenous capitalistic consumption afforded to every American purely by not being born in Canada or Mexico.

While all three PSAs are thankfully voiced by Mel Blanc, they don’t sport the animated quality of Although, I’d speculate some of it (watch Daffy) is reused animation from The Bugs Bunny and Tweety Show, which is also where I would guess these originally ran between.

Nice to see Bugs lay out something so simple people tend to forget: The Constitution is supposed to change with the times. (But seriously, ain’t no one takin’ my guns!) Politics aside, I enjoyed these a billion times more than Bugs Bunny’s Looney Christmas Tales.

PRODUCT RECOMMENDATIONS (Shop Amazon through us – it helps!)

LOOK: I’m not gonna tell you again, these Looney Tunes: Golden Collections are amazing, not being produced anymore and undoubtedly disappearing. Get ‘em quick, because I really dislike the lack of cartoons, special features, and repeated stuff you’ll find on newer Warner DVDs. I’ve listed my two favorite sets, but I strongly recommend you buy ALL OF THEM soon, if not now

Did over thirty-five years of Valentine’s Day rejection turn Charlie Brown into a nicotine-addicted arsonist?! Either that, or Banksy’s back in town…

I’ll never know how exactly people in the press are so quick to attribute art to a guy who struggles fiercely to retain his anonymity while producing work in secret. But the reports are in: Banksy’s is in LA! And he’s got a good publicist who’s letting the world know he’s turned several of our cherished animated characters into of awe-inspiring acts of vandalism!

Mickey and Minnie, in a full on drunken grope-fest

If there’s anything I love more than unwanted “Street Art” that ruffles local feathers, it’s the stuff that actually looks good. (Seriously, your signature is interesting to nobody but you, kid.)

Napalm: A previous Banksy, featuring Mickey, Ronald McD, and the fleeing, naked girl made famous in an iconic Vietnam War photo

I won’t pretend to know much about Banksy. At least not any more than anybody else who’s seen his hilarious documentary / pretentious prank film, Exit Through the Gift Shop – which I thoroughly recommend and would absolutely lose my shit should it pick up that Oscar for Best Documentary!

In the film, Banksy and pals pull a hilariously disturbing guerrilla art installation right outside Disneyland’s Thunder Mountain to celebrate the magic of Guantanamo Bay’s detainment center

I don’t know from art, unfortunately… However, I do know this: This isn’t the first time Banksy’s employed classic cartoon characters to make, what I assume, “A Statement!” (Don’t mean to trivialize, but I’m not ashamed to say I enjoy these on a profoundly juvenile level.)

Whatever’s doing this to Tweety, I propose it stop immediately!

Above you can see an animatronic Tweety Bird molting morosely at a New York art installation.

Guess their attempt to become legitimate business men failed

An original acrylic painting of Baloo and the Jungle Book gang bound for execution, apparently commissioned by Greenpeace to condemn deforestation, yet went unused due to complaints from Disney and was recently put up for auction.

“Oh bother. I’ve become shackled to the pursuit of materialistic gain.”

The guy’s also notorious for this stencil art piece involving a pre-Disney Winnie the Pooh caught in a bear strap, seemingly after a losing battle with The Man brand Hunny. But my favorite animated stab by this mysterious artist is actually just that: Animated!

Evidently, the folks behind The Simpsons found Exit Through the Gift Shop as compelling and hysterical as I did, and commissioned Banksy to produce a “Couch Gag” for the 2010 season. What bothered me about it was the Internet’s knee jerk response of “Dude, Banksy really pulled one over on The Simpsons. lol!” Uh, dude, apparently the guy’s not easy to find… so assuming the producers went to all that trouble, and Bansky didn’t animate the thing himself, I’m fairly certain several dozen people saw the thing before it aired.

An enslaved unicorn using his horn to punch holes in Simpsons DVDs? Classic!

It was unarguably hilarious, albeit a bit harsh, I’ll admit. However, I’d argue that it was actually far closer to a “classic” Simpsons gag than anything I’ve seen air on this once controversial program in the last ten years. A perfect fit, IMO.

Okay, the headline is obviously a joke, and a cynical one at that. But seriously, what capitalistic titan could you possibly imagine assembling Marmaduke, Beetle Bailey, Blondie, Dick Tracy, Garfield, Peanuts, Little Orphan Annie, Brenda Starr, and Spider-Man as pitchmen for their product? Hint: You DID NOT see this during the Super Bowl…

The NEWSPAPER?! Or more specifically, the Sunday Comics. Man, if this doesn’t say something about the decline of print, then I don’t know what does. Even if the commercial didn’t fork over the cash for the likenesses of all the characters animated exclusively to hock “The Funnies,” the star-studded roster stands as an even further testament to how powerful newspapers once were, not to mention the mega-franchises who once called it home.

“We must, can, and will flip passed World News to get to Hagar the Horrible!”

Because as best I can tell, this ad takes place sometime after 1979 and isn’t for any one newspaper in particular. In fact, the comic strip characters featured were (and still are) the property of multiple distribution syndicates, and the the only commercial I glimpsed during this year’s “Big Game” that even came close to packing this much star power was for the NFL itself, and that was just existing footage culled together with added effects that bordered on insulting.

Moving pictures on a TV? An odd choice for advertising a newspaper

Either way, the commercial is fucking righteous! Even better, the spot features recording legend Stan Freberg, the voice behind Looney Tunes characters like Junyer Bear, Pete Puma, on certain occasions, Wile E. Coyote, as well as one of my all-time favorite cartoons, “Three Little Bops!”

Other highlights include, a far more elderly sounding Spider-Man (also Freberg?) with incredibly awkward crawling sound effects, a joke that never would’ve flown during the Clinton/Lewinski days, and one of the laziest excuses for a “tag” you ever did see: “If you’re not reading the Sunday Comics… WHY NOT?!” Guess these Mad Men couldn’t foresee the answer being that they’d be marginalized to the point of becoming unfunny and irrelevant.

GIFT WRAPPED
Originally Premiered: February 16, 1952
A hungry cat tries to land hot Christmas meal. His arsenal: everything underneath the tree

BACKSTORY:
The cruel little bird known for his adorable speech impediment was with us before mispronouncing the word “sweetie pie,” earning him the name Tweety.

Tweety’s first appearances

His first cartoon as the cat-foiling character we all know came in Bob Clampett’s A Tale of Two Kitties from 1942. However, back then he was still referred to internally as “Orson,” the original name given to him during a cameo, his real 1st appearance, in Clampett’s WWII short Wacky Blackout made just a few months prior.

Sylvester, originally cast as a reluctant suicidal aid, and Tweety’s first Abbott and Costello inspired victims

As it turns out, not only did Sylvester spend a bit of time without a name as well, he originally starred alongside a suicidal bird, a woodpecker and even Porky Pig. Following Clampett’s departure from the Warner Brother, Friz Freling picked up the Tweety reigns and decided to combine him with his lisping cat in 1947’s “Tweetie Pie” and the two have been synonymous ever since. The duo would go on to win Warner its very first Oscar for an animated short and they even got their own bizarre detective show, The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries, which ran for five seasons on the now-defunct WB network.

BREAKDOWN:

In this house lies… a ravenous hunger

Finally, we gotta Looney Tunes short up in here! Wish it hadn’t taken so long, since Bugs and Co. have only been represented thus far by the late 70’s shit sandwich, Looney Christmas Tales. Thing is, Warner Bros. cartoons feature plenty of Holiday gags – Bugs dressed like Santa, somebody singing “Jingle Bells” briefly, etc. – but I haven’t found a whole lot of shorts starring the iconic LT gang fully shelled in Christmas.

Not what it looks like – there’s a bird at stake!

Obviously, the oversight isn’t due to the rigid criteria of A Cartoon Christmas (we did MST3K for God’s sake!) and it’s about finding the right feel, which is perfectly exemplified by 1952′s Gift Wrapped.

Next stop: Mouthville, then onto Stomach Station and Kitty Colon Gulch

If there’s anything I love more than a wholly Christmas-themed short, it’s one that take place entirely under or around a Christmas tree!

“A rubber mouse? C’mon, gimme something I can eat in two seconds”

Not only does that mean glorious imagery O’ The Season, it virtually guarantees that all the gags will somehow involve Christmas decorations and stereotyped versions of toys kids don’t even ask for anymore.

Honestly, who knows if she’ll live to open it?

Now, it’s not that “Bill O’Reillying” the disappearance of Christmas toy standards (“If a Christmas Tweety cartoon were made today, it’d involve Sylvester getting whacked with a Wii Remote and being strangled by a pair of iPod earbuds – HAYOOO!”) it’s that the generic toys of Xmas are still used in depictions made today. And I love seeing traditional shit like candles, glass balls, and toy trains used in the name of pure violence.

He’ll need a crane

Besides, outside of that, “Gift Wrapped” is a largely by-the-numbers Tweety and Sylvester cartoon. Not that that’s a bad thing… You’ve got bird eating jokes:

Feathers can’t be good for the feline digestive system

Cat eating jokes

The fastest way to a dog’s stomach is through his butt

Dynamite gags!

Who’s selling dynamite to birds?! Terrorists… that’s who

And what the hell, a little bit of gunplay!

AHAHAHA! You’re dead forever

Actually, those last two have been slightly altered, or removed altogether when last they saw television airwaves. One thing, you may never have seen is Sylvester staggering down the stairs after reeling the through a sawed hole in the ceiling:

I don’t think that’s racist?

Other showings have removed Tweety’s “popgun” blast, while some have even excised the “Geronimo” sequence in its entirety, despite being a fairly innocuous, almost childlike depiction of Cowboys and Indians.

Hey, Injuns watch cartoons now too, people

Either way, it all ends with a whipsmart solution from Granny, and the gang comes together to sing “Hark the Herald Angel Sings.”

Although, I’m not sure how she expected to get a rousing vocal performance from her pets like this:

Making bound and gagged people watch you sing is really more of a ritual for serial killers

Other than the carol at the end, none. Although rumors persist that Granny was conceived immaculately.

Say what you will about whether these cartoons were made for kids or adults, the setup wholeheartedly acknowledges the existence of Santa Claus. Unhappy with present (a rubber mouse) Sylvester switches the tags with a far bigger gift (Tweety) addressed to Granny, the only occupant in the house besides Hector the Bulldog.

The perfect crime

And it actually works! Either the old bitch is senile, or this cartoon was visited by Saint Nick!

It’s a fairly standard Tweety and Sylvester joint, although the imagery is unmistakable, plus all the Christmas cheer under the tree gets used as a weapon. Couple that with the wonderful snippets of Holiday standards by composer Carl Stalling, and you’ve got a fantastic piece of Christmas animation that should definitely work its way into your December rotation.

PRODUCT INFORMATION

Gift Wrapped is available on Volume Two of the phenomenal Looney Tunes Golden Collection. Sadly, this series has been discontinued and Warner Bros. has been trying their hand at other release formats that don’t stack up to the wonderful features and overall value found on all six editions of the Golden Collection, so I encourage you to pick it up soon if you have any interest whatsoever. They’re currently going for a song, and barring any kind of comprehensive, chronological Looney Tunes release, I guarantee these sets will end up fetching well over $100 once the stock is cleared. The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries – The Complete First Season is also available on DVD, and hey, you can’t go wrong with a Christmas Tweety plushy!

Yesterday’s Christmas Special
FROSTY THE SNOWMAN

2009′s Dec. 3rd Christmas  Special
A WISH FOR WINGS THAT WORK

Yesterday we presented our favorites, now it’s time to make with last year’s very best bad!

5. Bugs Bunny’s Looney Christmas Tales

I always come off like a Disney fanboy, but the fact of the matter is that they’re just better with how they preserve and handle their animated characters. Bugs Bunny’s Looney Christmas Carol is the perfect example of that. Not only is it the victim of horrible 70’s animation done on the cheap, outside of the Chuck Jones Road Runner portion, the whole special is pretty much a disgrace to the Warner Bros. animated legacy. I desperately desire more Xmas-themed Looney Tunes, but they’re a bit hard to find. And come on… just look at these screenshots, and you tell me how this stacks up to something like Mickey’s Christmas Carol.

4. Christmas Comes to Pacland

I might’ve been too harsh on the Pac-Man cartoon. In all fairness, it’s no worse than just about everything else Hanna-Barbera put out in the 70s and 80s. It adheres to the same wacky, mystery-solving formula, using tired gags and lame jokes, while doing its best to animate as little as possible. That makes Christmas Comes to Pacland understandable, although no less terrible. What I can’t forgive are the giant leaps in logic the special takes in order to put a first draft script on television screens. Plus, I’ve always found the fact that Pac-Man sounds like a phlegmmy, alcoholic bluesman with a three-pack-a-day habit supremely disturbing.

3. The Super Mario Bros. Super Show: Koopa Klaus

As a lifelong gamer and fan of Mario, believe me when I say you’ll only be able to watch this special through the gapped fingers of a half-hour long face palm. The live action sequences are embarrassing enough, but the depths of idiocy found in the animated portions may send some into fits of violently primal nerd rage. Why is Mario dressed for a calypso vacation? Why is he using a whip? Why is the person who voiced Toad still allowed to walk amongst men? You’ll have to watch the special to find out, which I strongly advise against.

2. The Great Santa Caper starring Raggedy Ann and Andy

I love writing about obscure, forgotten Christmas specials featuring licensed characters of yore, but this was just depressing. To watch Chuck Jones, the mastermind behind How the Grinch Stole Christmas, derivatively breathe life into these utterly useless characters and come out with just under half a Christmas special will suck the soul from your body. As someone not born in the 1920s, maybe I just don’t care about these stupid dolls enough. But still… If Teddy Ruxpin were still clinging to a shred of relevance, and paid Ren & Stimpy’s John Kricfalusi enough to humiliate himself with a half-assed Christmas special starring plushy tape recorders, I’d be bitching up a storm too. Bleh…

1. He-Man and She-Ra: A Christmas Special

It’s with great shame that I cop to being a diehard He-Man fan as a kid, yet it’s nothing compared to embarrassment everyone involved in this crossover Christmas special should feel. I’m not sure how Mattel got away with making daily commercials that were little more than an excuse to hurl new action figures at childrens’ eyeballs for 22 minutes… But having to watch a full hour of it, skinned in an idiotic Christmas shell brought about by two kids who get sucked into Eternia, should be sternly regulated by the FDA. I am sicker for having watched this